Rewiring the Brain: From Caregiver Meltdown to Mindful Recovery
I was in a private room at work, sitting across from my coworker — about to blow. My posture was tense, eyes wild, breathing sharp. I could barely contain my words.
“Calm down, Monica. Calm down,” my colleague urged.
It doesn’t even matter what I was so angry about. What did matter: this was totally out of character for me. The boiling rage in my stomach scared me. We worked it out, but that near losing it propelled me to see my doctor. Something was very wrong.
The stress had been building, and I thought I’d been handling everything. But at what cost?
My doctor convinced me my health was seriously at risk. Caring for my husband, Jerry — as his agency declined and medical emergencies increased — coupled with managing the household and working full-time was taking its toll.
It wasn’t until years later that we discovered he had a rare neurodegenerative disease called Progressive Supranuclear Palsy.
Long before the diagnosis gave our struggle a name, my doctor saw that I was quietly coming apart. Fortunately, I was able to take three months off work under Family and Medical Leave — because the stress had broken me. I needed time for emotional and physical self-repair.
During that time, Jerry and I started taking meditation classes multiple times a week. I dove deeply into mindfulness practices, researched Parkinson’s Disease (Jerry’s initial diagnosis), and attended health-related support groups and conferences.
What I didn’t know then but would eventually learn: stress wasn’t just affecting me emotionally. It was rewiring my brain — and not in a good way.
Most of us know that lifestyle practices like eating right, exercising, and getting enough sleep are critical to our health and longevity. I attended the online Rewiring Your Brain Summit, a multi-session event that left me brimming with ideas. Speakers described the very benefits I’d experienced through meditation, such as better sleep, reduced anxiety, and increased happiness and contentment. Even more compelling was research showing that meditation can physically reshape the brain, slowing or even reversing the effects of aging on both mind and body.
I’m not trying to live forever. I just want to increase the odds of staying active and healthy as I age. If meditation has been shown to reduce markers related to inflammation and poor mental health, and I find it a satisfying, centering practice, then what’s not to like?
A lot of people think meditation isn’t for them because they can’t quiet their thoughts. But like any skill, it just takes a little practice and time to develop.
There are many kinds of meditation and just as many ways to begin. While I got started at a local meditation studio, free programs and apps abound, and the best entry point depends on how you like to learn. Try a few styles and see what resonates. It turns out, mind training isn’t about emptying your mind — it’s about choosing where to place your attention.
Some practices are guided, leading you through a body scan or calming imagery. Others use anchors like breath, a mantra (a repeated word or phrase), or even a candle flame held in soft focus. Whatever the form, your mind will wander, and that’s normal. The practice is gently bringing it back.
Meditation is not magic; it’s mindful effort, repeated gently and often. Each return is a rep for your brain. You’re building new neural pathways, strengthening existing circuits, and investing in your long-term brain health — one breath at a time.
Monica Wright, a retired speech-language pathologist, enjoys reflecting on life’s transitions through creative nonfiction — inviting readers to look with her.